Inbreeding – The Social Way

We Southerners always get a bad rap. Whether on TV, in the movies, or some dip shit that says out loud and to your face, “Hey, don’t all you southerners intermarry? Is your uncle really your daddy?”

So to clear the air, not all southerners marry their cousins.

I was thinking one day and pondering how I came to be connected with so many folks around Cyberville and noticed a wonderful thing. Here’s how it works:

I connect to Joe Blow. Three days later Joe Blow’s connection John Q. Public sends me a connection request because he sees that I’m a friend of his friend Joe, and he respects Joe’s opinions (for the most part) or sees some comment I made on Joe’s FB or Twitter stream that he decides he too, would love to connect with me. The next thing you know, not only have I made friends with Joe and John Q. and have been engaging with them in conversations and content sharing – I have reached out to their friends Tom, Dick and Harry and they have obliged me in connecting…and so on, and so on.

I now have this awesome community with whom I engage almost on a daily basis. Shootin’ the sh#$, sharing their blogs and links, and just plain ole getting to know them.

A waste of time, you say? I beg to differ.

You see, I have made many friends online, many acquaintances that know about my business, what I’m passionate about, what rocks my boat. They also know how much I care about them because I share their shit too! In fact, I make a habit of it.

When the time comes that they themselves or someone they know needs my services, or they want me to blog for them about my area of expertise, they are already connected with me and have organically grown this relationship – all they need to do is ask. I’m not having to cold call them (which is so a thing of the past) but they are just about one click away from me.

If you’re not building a solid online community of engage-rs (not just those selling you their wares) you’re totally missing out. And I believe I have the coolest online friends ever – whether that turns a profit or not.

Stop evaluating this according to ROI and start building relationships.

And for Pete’s sake, stop asking me if I connect to every Tom, Dick or Harry – I just told you I do.

If you want to read more on inbreeding in America – check out “When Cousins Get Married.”

I’m sure you’re not a douchebag but you come across that way on Facebook!

douchebagThanks to social media our lives are shared on every online platform you can think of – some good, funny and sarcastic. That’s just the way it is. I’ve been an asshat on social media and lived to tell about it – it happens.

Sometimes folks simply want to share funny pictures and stories, sometimes they share their blogs and work related info and sometimes just random stuff. It all works together. It merges our personal and professional lives. Often people look at that as a bad thing and pull the reins in and say “Whoa! Wait a minute – I’m not sure if I want folks hearing all about my weekend.” It can be good, it can be not-so-good. I do think, however, it can work.

I’ve shared personal things that I wish I hadn’t shared but that doesn’t keep me off of social. You live and learn (hopefully).

What I’ve found is that most of the stuff we come across on Social Media Facebook and/or Twitter is to be taken with a grain of salt. We should chill out and not take things so personal (me included).

Most folks on Facebook want to share their funny happenings in words and or pictures and it works. I share bizarre updates all the time and there are those who respond as if I’m actually serious as a heart attack. But it’s mostly those who don’t know me well, my style or my sense of humor.

They tend to pass out advise of why I shouldn’t say those types of things online (in public) or correct me when in fact I’m simply being random and trying to be funny and keep it light.

I always feel like I need a disclaimer on my page saying “Intents not always how they appear” or something to that fact so folks will know I’m usually joshing. In fact, about 80% of my updates on Facebook are funny pics, silly updates, comments made about my crazy world and are simply an exaggeration.

We need to understand that no one is out to get us. We need to be able to be ourselves online and off. Those that know me  understand that I’m WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get) – online or off. I usually don’t have a good filter on this mouth. Sure, this can occasionally come back and bite us but can also lead to a whole lotta fun and create engaging conversations.

Not long ago I posted a status update about a family member that lives with me currently – trying to be funny. My facebook friends tell me when they see me in person or online that they love my family updates and stories. It’s all in good fun. But someone who had just connected with me and not knowing my personality thought to take it upon themselves to point out how I could make the situation better and by giving me their idiotic advice. If I want advice I’d ask you for it or go see a shrink.

There are times I ask for advice from my friends online and they are always willing to help. But mostly, I’m trying to create funny and engaging connections and interactions. I want to keep it light and fun.

The moral to this story is try not to be a douchebag and offer your advice if not asked for it. Try not being a shrink on social media sites and fixing all the world’s problems (including your friends) unless they want that from you. Lighten up, chill out – it’s not all about you and getting your point across.

Now, go have fun. And make sure to share how folks are acting like douchebags and asshats on social in the comment section HERE>

Photo credit: obscureathon


Annoying Apps and Invites: Don’t always blame it on your Facebook friends

facebook_apps_and_gamesWe’ve all been inundated with app requests within Facebook such as Angry Birds, Farmville and even Birthday requests. It never seems to stop.

There was a time when I would literally post status updates saying “I won’t join your Farmville – no matter how much you pay me, so stop sending the request to join.” Some folks got offended and others got me to thinking that perhaps it wasn’t my friends at all trying to get me to join them in playing games on Facebook. Hmmm…..

I then put on my research cap and went to looking around the webs for more information on this and found things such as:

With that knowledge I quickly started changing all my notifications and settings within Facebook having to do with the apps and games. Guess what? Nothing changed. I continued to receive notifications and requests.

This got me thinking to myself “If Facebook can control the ads we see by what we’re discussing – perhaps they’re the ones sending me those app and game suggestions.” As a matter of fact, I’m sure that these companies are paying Facebook to have their precious app incorporated within the platform and how are folks to hear about the app if Facebook doesn’t tell them?

Then I wondered if I was yelling at my friends within Facebook to stop sending me requests for no reason? It’s quite possible.

We have been sold a bill of goods that if we change our notifications and settings we have control over what we see. We’ve also been told that we can control our privacy settings by a click of the button – but is this really the truth? I think not.

Here’s the thing we need to understand – no matter what we do Facebook (or any other platform) can do what they want with our information. Nothing on the webs is private or can be kept under control – we’re only made to believe that and we shrug our shoulders and continue on about our business.

Facebook keeps looking for ways to get information to the masses through what we share, like and talk about. That’s a fact and I don’t blame them for that. They have to make money somehow.

I just think they should come right out and say it “We’re watching everything you do – so we can suggest what you’ll like next, where you’ll eat, what you buy, what games you play, who you play them with” etc. Not making us think that our actual friends are calling on us to join them in their endeavors.

In the end I must apologize to my Facebook pals. I’ve been blaming you for something I should have researched earlier.

What do you think? Have you thought the same thing?

5 Things I Hate About Linked In

A few weeks back when I wrote the post “What NOT to post on your Linked In profile” I mentioned that I would be coming up with this post on a few things I hate about Linked In. I guess HATE would be too strong a word.

Just like any other SM site, Linked In has its crazies. These are a few of my pet peeves:

1. Generic Linked In Invitations – I get we’re all busy and are spending bookoodles of time online but taking five minutes to write an “I’d like to connect with you because….” invite just sets you apart and doesn’t take much effort. I wrote about it HERE. Tell me if you’re coming over from Twitter, or you met me at so-and-so’s networking luncheon. It just helps.

2. Please Recommend Me and I’ll Recommend You” – We have all gotten these and I tell you, I just don’t dig it! I don’t mind if I actually KNOW you and have engaged with you, but more importantly have we worked together in any capacity? How do I know that you have integrity and a great work ethic? More about that HERE.

3. You’re So Pretty, Would You Buy My SkinCare Line? – First of all, thank you for the compliment. Secondly, no. Don’t use your connection with me to try and SELL me something. I know you are there, if I need it I know where to find you. (Isn’t this how it works?) Let’s don’t abuse our relationships. Let’s instead, help each other.

4. Stop Posting Your Website and Blog Links in my group! – I have to have a little leeway on this because when I was first starting out on the SM Highway, I was doing just this. The more I understood strategy (and felt like a loser – always promoting myself) the more I developed a strategy of engagement and relationship marketing. If you’re doing this, do yourself a favor and go read Kyle Lacy and Erik Decker‘s book Branding Yourself.

5. Linking Your Tweets – I know, a lot of folks do this and it can help drive traffic, yes. I agree. But it can also become very annoying to those with whom you are connected. Why? Cause we’re constantly seeing your tweets, not only on Twitter, but on Facebook and now on Linked In. (Maybe this is a personal pet peeve, who knows) And some of the biggest folks in SM and Branding do this, not just us little guys.

All in all, if you’re online anywhere, you’re going to have to learn to just put up with some nonsense. It’s.A.Fact. And Linked In is no different than any other Social Media platform. Groups can be a wonderful tool to engage, share your expertise and so forth. I’ve connected with some fabulous folks on Linked In. And then some, not so great.

Everyone has their opinion of this or that, and these are just mine. Please understand, I think Linked In is a great resource, especially for business relationships and meeting those you’d never have a chance to meet. We’re all evolving, hopefully. And these are a few things we learn along the way.

Heck, Linked In was a valuable tool when I was trying to deal with my Bank. I couldn’t get past the gate-keeper to the Vice-President with my issue, and I went straight to Linked In, sent a request to him and connected, grabbed his email address and shot a two-page letter to him. I received a reply with a resolution within 48 hours.

Photo Credit: HelenArmstrong

Can Social Media hinder you from getting that new job?

Ten years ago, the mere thought of using social media to hire or fire someone was completely unheard of. Today employees wonder if their next update on Facebook will also mean the unemployment line for them. How can social media play such an important role in employment today?

It’s a proven fact, that more than half of employers today will use some form of social media to network and screen potential employees before offering them a position with their company. While there are very popular social media sites to choose from, almost 50% choose to use  LinkedIn, just a little over half choose Twitter, and almost 80% decide to use Facebook.

Even bosses sometimes try to avoid any type of confrontation if they can when using social media services, they do not have to depend on meeting the prospective candidate up front. Using social media allows them to feel more comfortable and help them to focus more on the real situation at hand.

Employers will most normally consider and interview a potential candidate for the job shortly after receiving their application. Most employers will have a special group of personnel in human resources to handle this daunting task for them so they can continue to work. There are several ways that HR can handle hiring an individual. Some may choose to use certain HR software, however if the business is run online they may choose to use an online software. This special software for HR professionals is not cheap but once you purchase it you may never go back to hiring people the old fashioned way.

Even positions that are available at a local location are sometimes found online first in order to find someone to fit the description of the ideal candidate and essentially take up less time of employer’s who already have a jammed pack schedule.

Today potential employees must worry about their presentation which all starts with a piece of paper listing who you are.

At the same time, employees who already have a job need to worry about what their bosses may say or do if you start venting on the social media sites about something that is not going right at work. Whether you mean to or not, what you say online can affect your entire future.

Be careful and think it through; you may only get one chance to make the right impression. (Liam Condit)

Susan’s Two-Cents

Here’s a little video I captured from one of Charlie Judy’s posts on Recruitment and HR that scared the padooky out of me!

While I’m at it, what’s your take on the subject?

About the Author:

Liam Condit, an HR Professional, has been writing industry related news and comment since 2006. Other interests include jobs, marketing, politics and sport. He works with Computers In Personnel specializing in recruitment and HR system hostings.

Photo Credit: Flickr

SHRM junkies and tattoo parlors

So we’ve all been talking SHRM11 until we’re blue in the face. The hype for the upcoming conference has almost become unbearable and the pressure is mounting.

I was recently in a local Tattoo Parlor (d0 they still call it that?) with a friend who was getting a monkey tattoo (not as bizarre as it sounds) and had a brief moment of stupidity in thinking, “hey, I should get the SHRM logo tattooed on my left ankle! That’s when you know you’ve seen too much publicity of an event! You’ll be glad to know that moment of stupidity was as I stated “brief” and subsided.

In all sincerity I am totally stoked about going to Vegas for the SHRM11 Conference but can’t decide if it’s the conference I’m hyped up about or just going to Vegas, seeing as how I’ve never been and always wanted to go.  I’m sure it is the combination of the two.

I’m also excited about meeting so many of you and having a little #F2F (face to face) action. I’m met so many of you online through Twitter especially and now on Facebook and I’m looking forward to seeing your gorgeous faces in person. I enjoy interacting with all of you on a regular basis.

So, that being said – I’ll see you in Sin City!